Updates and such

For those of you waiting for this week's updates...you might have a bit longer to wait than usual.

I'm in the last minute stages of prepping for CONvergence, and we leave for the convention tomorrow.

I'm working on a last-minute LEGO project that I hope to display, along with Tom, Crow, the Forrester Mural and some other things. I'm bringing several cameras, so there should be some interesting stuff showing up my Flikr Stream if you want to keep an eye on it.

I'm also finishing up sets for the next arc of Brick House - hence the delay there.

Anyway, I'll be back in town, and hopefully back on track, by next Tuesday.

In the meantime, check back occasionally - I'm bringing my laptop so I should be posting *something* over the next few days.

Finally, for those of you who are grumpy about all the recent interruptions to your free entertainment - after this con I'll be officially out of cash for a few months, so I'm more likely to be around and working on the site.

Episode 712

Read the comic here.

Observant readers will note that this puts all our hero groups into "Plot Device Drive" at the same time.

That can't be good...

Brickworld Photos on-line

I got a chance to upload the rest of my Brickworld 2009 photos to Flickr.



Click on the pic to go directly to the set!

Episode 711

Read the comic here.

Donut's dialog in the final panel is a tribute to an old "Ren and Stimpy" short about the History Eraser Button. Go watch it.

Toybox of FAIL: Soldier

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
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I've got a good one for you today. A single bootleg that manages to cross several corporate lines - creating a sickening mish-mash of a "toy", poised to shatter and cut your fingers at the slightest provocation.

It only makes sense that such a violent bootleg would carry a militaristic name like "Soldier."





Before I show you today's fail, though, I thought it best to familiarize you with the main toy that's being ripped off.



This is LEGO Bionicle set 4878, Rahaga Bomonga. Yes, it's a goofy name.

Have you taken a good look at this set? Are you ready to move on to the FAIL?

I sure hope so.



Yes, it's the return of our "good friends" at BRICK. There's really no attempt to hide the LEGO origins of this toy - from the matching typefaces on the logos, the color schemes, the base toy itself, to the duplicate instructions for the toy's flying disc feature, there's giant heaps of copyright infringement everywhere.

Oh, sure, there are little differences. The background art is (slightly) different. The line name is different.

And, oh yeah, there's the strange fact that Solider has a DARTH VADER HEAD.



Before we look at that, though, here's some fun-to-read text from the top of the package:

Modern design.
Superior performance.
Skillful manufacture.
Perfect in workmanship.
High standard in quality and hygiene.

I was buying it up until they brought up high standards of hygiene.




Instead of including an instruction sheet, this time BRICK just printed the build on the back of the box. The fun begins when you notice the "check the size to make sure you have the right technic beam" illustrations are not printed to scale. In fact, the pictures are so tiny that they're nearly illegible. Way to go, BRICK!



Here's the base toy - it's a direct duplication of the LEGO build and parts. The plastic used is super brittle - and many of the joints and parts are defective. (Not enough plastic in the mold causing gaps or too much plastic preventing things from seating properly due to overruns.) The flying disc is there, but the gearing doesn't work, rendering that part of the toy useless.

But let's take a look at the real FAIL of this toy - the replacement of the Bionicle head with Darth Vader's helmet.




In person, this toy is almost cute in that "I'm going to tear off your toenails because that's all I can reach." way. You know. Like a rabid hamster or something.



Here's a detail of the face. It's not 100% Vader, but I don't think they were trying for anyone else. I guess they just didn't have a correctly-scaled Vader Mold lying around the factory to re-use.



Flipping the head over you can see the technic mount at the neck. Some poor worker was forced to carve this thing. Or maybe he volunteered for the task. I don't really know which would be worse.

Anyway, if you know anything about Bionicle, you know that LEGO loves to release six sets with basically the same parts cast in different colors. Take that knowledge as a bit of foreshadowing as to five other reviews that you'll be seeing in the near future.

Oh yes, the pain has just started.

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Many thanks to Joe from The Undiscovered Playthings for sending me this set to review.

Episode 710

Read the comic here.

Yes, this is something I set up years ago. For those of you who want a mild spoiler, you can click here. Otherwise wait and the context will be revealed in-strip.

Toybox of FAIL: Flying Disc

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
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Good news for you LEGO bootleg enthusiasts - I just received another shipment of FAIL from my good friend Joe of The Undiscovered Playthings blog. Until I can get them scanned and photographed, though, here's a little bit Summertime FAIL to whet your appetite for destruction.



Looks pretty innocent, doesn't it? Just your typical dollar store Frisbee.

Or is it...?


Flip it over and you find that you've bought yourself a poly-bag full of FAIL!



Yes, it's not just a Frisbee clone - it's a High Performance Gyroplane! But who's that in the logo?



Sky Sufer?




What the heck is a "Sufer"? Whatever it is, here he is.

Hmmm. This reminds me of something....

Oh. I bet they meant SURFER.

As in SILVER.



They do look similar, don't they?



Nah. It's probably just my imagination.

Episode 709

Read the comic here.

Here's a quick link back to Episode 431.

Episode 708

Read the comic here.

Yes, this was a bit like arguing with myself. Why?

I just got done rebuilding Crow's nest at Brickworld. Came back to the table to find it shattered. This is why we can't have nice things.

*grumble*

Edited to add: Turns out the cleaning crew bumped the table. They let the convention staff know, and they passed along an apology when they saw me.

An accident like that is completely understandable - it's much better than my suspicion that it had been some stranger playing with the model, breaking it, and then sneaking away.

Brickworld: Day 2

I'm having a great time here at Brickworld. Haven't taken that many photos (yet) but you can watch for updates in my Flickr Stream by clicking the image above.

Just arrived at brickworld- I don't think anyone is awake yet...

Episode 707

Read the comic here.

Episode 706

Read the comic here.

LEGO: My Micropolis Module

Just in time for Brickworld, I've finally gotten around to building my own Micropolis Module. It's a 1/2 block showing LEGO mining in downtown Micropolis.



Most of the action takes place below street level, taking advantage of the four-plate-workable-depth of the base. Features include a wee little crane, bull dozer, and security checkpoint. (Click on the photo to go back to my Flickr photostream for more.)

Maybe not the most original work in the universe, but not too bad for a first attempt. If you're at Brickworld, see if you can find my module in the big collaborative display.

Episode 705

Read the comic here.

Episode 704

Read the comic here.

Toybox of FAIL: Canadian Batman Paratrooper

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
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Until I get my hands on some more recent offerings, it's time to dive deep into the cobweb-filled corners of my basement in search of the bootleg toys that I kept for some stupid reason.

Sure, if you've taken the time to look at the old Island of Bootleg Toy archives you might recognize a returning friend or two. Nearly ten years have passed since I wrote those reviews, though, and it's time we took a fresh look at them. If nothing else, the new pictures won't be limited to early 2000's super-compressed thumbnail JPGs...

After the recent run of fairly high-quality bootlegs from the Little White Dragon company, I thought it was time to remind everyone just what a FAIL is supposed to look like.


Yes, this is the FACE of FAIL.

Say hello (again) to Batman, the Canadian Paratrooper.





In some ways it's good that this is a Reheated Review. The packaging for this toy consisted of nothing more than just a clear plastic bag with the figure stuffed into it. No header card, no hints as to it's origin. If it weren't for my old review to remind me that he came from Canada in the nigh-forgotten year of 2000, I would have had to make up an origin story for him.

A story, no doubt, focused on illegal Canadian Gene-splicing and toxic waste creating a foul beast that roams the night, gliding quietly down from the trees to feast on unsuspecting children.

But, no, we know this bootleg Batman isn't nearly that cool.



There's no question that this figure is meant to be Batman. The logo, although woefully off-center, is identical to the DC comic's version. The mold the figure was cast from appears to be scaled up from a Kenner Batman movie-styled action-figure. Articulated at the shoulders and hips, he's made of waxy plastic. At this point he rattles when you shake him, suggesting some internal plastic has broken loose from the joins.



The rest of the figure also suffers from a poor amount of quality control. Take a look at all the excess plastic around his feet.



From behind, we see Batman comes complete with a cape. Of course, it's not much of a cape.


In fact, it seems to be nothing more than a section of a glad trash bag with a hole cut in it for the figure's head to slip through. Quality workmanship.



Batman's parachute hasn't weathered well over the years - whatever rainbow-hued toxic paint was used has stuck to the plastic (and itself) and smeared into a tie-dyed mess. I was hoping to take some "action shots" of Batman at the park tomorrow, but when I found his 'chute was more of less stuck together I abandoned the idea.



Here's a close-up of the parachute and the disease-riddled paint job. It's almost as bad the paint job on Batman's face.

What? You've forgotten how bad that was already? Here. Let me show you again.



Look closer.





Closer.




Closer.



Can you smell the cheap whiskey on his breath? Can you feel his rough plastic stubble rubbing against your skin?

Canadian Batman looks deep into your soul and finds you wanting.






I wouldn't worry about it, though. He's just a scummy bootleg.

New Blog Functionality

As I keep mentioning, next week I'll be at BrickWorld. Since I'm not sure how much net access I'll have, I'm setting up some features to let me remote-post to the blog from my various mobile devices. If you see some test posts pop up and then disappear, that's what's going on.

I'll also be setting up as much content as I can to auto-publish. We'll see how that goes.

The downside will be comment moderation. I'm not comfortable turning things back to unmoderated, but there's going to be some serious lag-time on things unless I do. Oh well. I'll burn that bridge when I come to it.

Episode 703

Read the comic here.

Toybox of FAIL: City (Part 6 of 6)

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
-=-
This is it, gang. Last of the LEGO bootlegs I have on hand to review. Will it be something fun and original?

Are you kidding?






Like the previous FAIL, this final Little White Dragon set is another version of a BRICK bootleg. This time it's Motive Train that returns in a slightly classier format.



The fact that this set is much nicer than the previous toy suggests that in terms of the Chicken and the Egg, LWD probably came first with BRICK as the copy-of-a-copy pirate.




The same missing mini-figure that appeared on the last CITY set also graces the Train's packaging. You think they could have at least faked an engineer figure; LEGO certainly gave them enough ideas for one.



The instruction sheet shows a distinctively non-LEGO approach - the special angle brackets that caused em trouble with City-Robot return here to help create an odd twist on "studs not on top" construction.



The final toy suffers from the same "lack of cohesion" as all the other LWD sets - a shame, really, as the color scheme is nice and the model itself somewhat interesting.



So that's it. We end of a bit of a high note, and not the complete Train Wreck many of you were expecting.

That's okay. I've got a real loser of a toy lined up for tomorrow.

Just you wait.
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As always, many thanks to Joe from The Undiscovered Playthings for sending me this set to review.

Episode 702

Read the comic here.

Finally they think to pump their one source of information for some useful data. But can he be trusted?

Toybox of FAIL: CITY (Part 5 of 6)

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
-=-

Today we have the next-to-last of the Little White Dragon LEGO-like impulse sets. It's been a long strange road to get to this point, and perhaps fittingly, it seems we've returned to where we started from.






One of the earliest FAILs was the City Agncl from the BRICK line of bootlegs. It was a puzzling set - the small truck wasn't too strange, but we puzzled over the odd choices for the accompanying items. (Follow the link above if you don't remember what I'm talking about, or glossed over it the first time. )

I ended that post with the following line:
Oh well. At least I never have to review this set again.

Boy, was I wrong.



Yep, City Angcl is back, in LWD form.

Some of the parts are different - the truck is a bit classier - but that same goofball island of crap of an accessory is back to plague us.



The set label feature this smiling fellow. No, he's not included.



The contents of the box are shown here. For a cost-concious bootleg line, I was a bit surprised to find an extra wheel hub in the parts bag. Somewhere there's a set that's one hub-shy of a full build, I bet.



The "Polizei" (German for "Police") stickers are a nice ironic touch.



Here's the mysterious parts island. Notice that the shield is a massive upgrade from the BRICK version. It's not a LEGO part; maybe it's from the Best Lock line. I don't recognize the"torch" part either.



And, finally, a close up of the Polizei Van.


I really don't have anything to add to the review. I think I said it all the first time.

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As always, many thanks to Joe from The Undiscovered Playthings for sending me this set to review.

Toybox of FAIL: City (Part 4 of 6)

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
-=-

Well, we're reaching the bottom of my box of LEGO knock-offs. The final three that I have on hand are all Little White Dragon CITY sets. Of course, by now you should know that just because they have "CITY" on the box it doesn't mean you can predict what theme you'll find inside.

I can't say I've saved the best for last - these are bootlegs after all - but at least these three sets each have a little something to make them worth reading about.








Why, look! It's a CITY set that could actually be taking place in a CITY! That's novel!

There's not a lot of context offered for this set, though. The box art suggests that this food stand is traveling at roughly sixty miles an hour. There's something written on the motion blurred sign to the figure's right...I can almost make out the words "FIRE", "AID" and "TEST". What that cryptic clue means is anyone's guess, though.


The Chef mini-figure gets a staring role in the Set Box. Too bad his wacky hat was too tall to fit in the graphic.




The figure is a dusky shade of tan dressed in a bright white outfit. He really does look silly in that hat. It's like someone put a malformed thumbtack into his head.



The set comes with these accessories - a cup, a frying pan, and a garden trowel.



The "playset" is this odd structure. The open studs on the inverted slopes give you a place to stick the cup into. Or, it would, if the poor part quality didn't result in spilled beverages due to an incompatible stud/rod match up.

*Insert joke about the bootleggers shoving that cup somewhere less comfortable**

Anyway, that's the 4th version of the CITY theme we've explored. And things just go downhill from here.

For those of you wondering (and possibly hoping), no, the end of the LEGO stash doesn't mean the end of the Toybox of FAIL. I have a giant stash of stuff left over from the Island of Bootleg Toys - a lot of it that has yet to see the light of day in a review. And Joe has told me there's more LEGO on the way.

So the FAIL goes on...
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As always, many thanks to Joe from The Undiscovered Playthings for sending me this set to review.

Episode 701

Read the comic here.

This episode was a pain to photograph. LEGO legs are just too short for decent "mysterious stranger" reveals. Not that these guys should be *too* mysterious.

Toybox of FAIL: Military

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
-=-


For better or for worse, LEGO has an established policy that they won't produce military themed sets. While this mandate is less and less clear cut every year (Star Wars and Batman themes both have new handguns, and the Agents sets are getting really, really close to military special ops, for example. Heck, the whole LEGOized Clone Wars line gives lie to the premise, doesn't it? Anyway...) there's nothing stopping the clone brands and, ultimately, the bootleggers from creating sets with a military theme.

Case in point: Today's FAIL. Simply called Military.








Oh, look it's another Race Car.

Well, almost. This set is actually very close in construction and parts to the strangely-titled CITY bootleg from LWD featuring a Mars Rover. Except this time the radar dish is apparently meant to be a mine detector.

I don't pretend to be as brave as those who decide to serve in the armed forces, but driving a car while looking for land mines seems like a foolish way to do things. Particularly when you notice that this guy isn't even steering - he's shooting his pistol into the air in celebration of his impending doom.



And it just me or does the driver's tiny rectangular mustache make him look a lot like Hitler?
(Okay, maybe that's supposed to be his nose. But I'm soooo not sure.)



The mini-figure is cast from the expected Best Lock molds, and comes with a removable vest. At least, I think it was meant to be removable. I had to struggle at it for a while, but I blamed that on the low quality castings that plague all the LWD bootlegs.



As for the vehicle....meh. It's poorly designed. Take a look:



When you try and seat the mini-figure the troubles begin. The combination of the figure's arm being in the way and the sad fact that the "megaphone" piece doesn't fit into the jumper brick at all result in a play-level FAIL.

Well, maybe Bootleg-Hitler will stop fooling around and look where he's driving now.

Wait. I take that back. I'd be much better if he did drive right onto a land mine. Then we wouldn't have to deal with the sad bootleg any more.

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As always, many thanks to Joe from The Undiscovered Playthings for sending me this set to review.

LEGO: Rubber Stamp #1 Mural

Yes, shockingly, I've completed another LEGO project. This one is a LEGO mosaic based on the work Rubber Stamp #1 by Jude Calvert-Toulmin.

I used the PicToBrick program to generate the mosaic pattern after first optimizing the image in Photoshop. The final mosaic is just one brick thick - and thus is a bit flimsy. I'll be adding a brick-built frame to the piece at some future point.

More photos at Flickr - just click on the image above to make the jump.

Episode 700

Read the comic here.

Reality starts to sink in for Fox, and Bilbo offers up a vital hint. Seems like a good way to spend a milestone episode.

Toybox of FAIL: Construction

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
-=-


We're still working our way through the latest batch of Little White Dragon knock-offs. Yesterday it was Engineering...which was really more of a Construction themed set. Today we have Construction. Maybe it'll be an engineering themed set. But I doubt it. Logic is never a key feature of bootlegs.



It'll all be okay, provided that Construction isn't another crappy race car.




Damn it.




*sigh* Okay. What can I point out about this one? Well, for starters, it's from the early stages of the LWD run - meaning it has many of the same wacko text blurbs we saw on LWD's Racing Car.
Let's review, shall we?


Set your imagination free and try to build as many coloured models as you can with the pieces you find in the box. Follow the photos on the box or invent other 1000 coloured models of your own!

TEST YOUR SKILL

Many Models to Chosse From!

There's also a fun little blurb in the lower right corner:



Little White Dragon Product of Honor
Japanese Technique High Quality Goods

Remember, of course, that the box also claims these toys were made in China. LWD is an international effort.




The driver of our little Construction vehicle is this dapper fellow. No, he looks nothing like the figure shown on the box. He's made from the LWD-Standard "Best Lock" stolen molds. Again, it's a shame that LWD championed multi-ethnic minifgures where other brands barely touch on the concept. It makes them harder to hate. And it's nearly impossible to bring any ill-will against this guy. Why?



Because he loves waffles.

He loves waffles so much that he carries on around with him in his front pocket.

You have to respect that in a mini-figure.



The toy isn't bad, either. I still think the hub-caps are a nice touch that LEGO should steal in compensation for all the pain clone brands and knock-offs give them.




Oh, but wait! The curse of LWD's poor molds strikes again! The car falls apart at the slightest touch due to the bricks being warped and shallow-studded!

Well, it serves us right for even thinking few good thoughts about a bootleg.

We should be ashamed of ourselves.

I know I am.


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As always, many thanks to Joe from The Undiscovered Playthings for sending me this set to review.

Episode 699

Read the comic here.

It was about time Fox had a little wake up call about her rampage.

So you don't have to go looking: In the background is "Pinkerton Floyd" from the 2007 Belville Advent - introduced in Episode 273.

Toybox of FAIL: Engineering

First time here? Please take a moment and read the Toybox of FAIL Disclaimer. Thanks!
-=-


Back to the LEGO bootleg grind today with a return to the sadness of the "almost nice enough to be legit" sets from Little White Dragon. So far we've seen City in Space, Civil War amongst the Pirates and Terror in the Wheat. What horrors do you think we'll see in a set simply called....Engineering?





Turns out, not much horror at all. Just the usual bit of confusion.



So...this is an engineering set? Is that really the right word? I mean, wouldn't construction fit just the teeniest bit better?



And just who is this begoggled gentleman in the set teaser? He's not in the box.



Instead we get...this. A pretty decent micro-scale shovel.

The only real gripes about this set are the usual - cheap, poorly molded pieces make the actual building of the model a dicey proposition at best. I'd be tempted to build a version of this using real LEGO bricks, but a few of the parts are Best Lock clones and thus not in my part bins.

Eh. Okay. Not a lot of FAIL today. I'll see if I can find a more interesting set for tomorrow.

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As always, many thanks to Joe from The Undiscovered Playthings for sending me this set to review.

MST3k: Tom and Crow

I decided to go ahead and write up a construction review of the Bots pre-convention.

If you're interested in how I put the guys together, check out my journal of the build.

Episode 698

Read the comic here.

MST3k: Crow and Tom in LEGO

For those of you who think I never build anything anymore...I present to you Crow T. Robot and Tom Servo from the show Mystery Science Theater 3000.

These guys will be at BrickWorld in June and CONVergence in July. Come by and say "hello!" They won't answer, because they're only LEGO replicas, not the real thing. But I somehow think they'd still like the attention....

I'll write up a full review on these guys after the conventions, but in the meantime you can check out more photos of them at my Flickr stream.

Episode 697

Read the comic here.

Mary Sue is trying to prove she still has the smarts. But is she right?